A Collective Need for Unbusy
I think that some people quickly dismiss slow living as lazy. Modern society encourages the hustle and rewards speed and efficacy. In the pursuit of faster living we look for ways to cram in more by resorting to energy boosting drinks, prescription drugs, or books that tell us how better utilize our time so we can produce more. We are addicted to instant gratification and in turn expected to function at the same intense speed.
I look at my past self, wearing my busyness like a badge of honor. As if not having the time to make plans with a friend or on my hobbies meant that my business was more successful (not necessarily the case) or that my career was impressive. It’s shocking to think we often base our worth on how successful we are (in the common conception of the word) which is often accompanied by tremendous busyness. The societal norm is to base our own self worth on the way others perceive us, and unfortunately many people believe busyness and success come hand in hand. The very chasing of more, bigger and faster is idealized. The age old sayings “simple is best,” “slow and steady wins the race,” “less is more,” and “wherever you are, there you’ll be” are buried and forgotten.
Slow living is a movement to rewire the dogma that says busyness means being worthy and or successful. That if you are happy, healthy, and able to spend your days doing the things you love, that you’re lazy, uninspired, languid, spiritless, and even worthless. The current gross misconception of this idea of success lends itself to our deeply ingrained doubt that our own aspirations lack significance. It is certainly not true. Whatever your desires may be they are yours and are just as significant as any other. Don’t let society determine your worth.
The Wise Philosophy of the Tortoise
If you’re busy doing the things you love you are fulfilling your intended life. But this isn’t necessarily the case for many of us who are or have been on a hamster wheel going nowhere while ultimately living someone else’s dream. Busyness, for the sake of busyness is the most toxic lifestyle of them all. When we’re busy getting by at a job we aren’t inspired by, or only participating in activities because it’s what our peers would approve of, we are not aligned with our own longings and our own meaning of “happy.”
Racing through life in this manner is reminiscent of Aesop’s fable “The Hare and the Tortoise.” The overconfident Hare is much like frazzled Jane. Convinced that reaching the finish line is her personal goal (because that’s what Ally and James and her parents said) she runs as fast as she can so quickly that she’s unaware it’s not her own dream she’s chasing. The Tortoise on the other hand is the mindful person taking their time, having their own thoughts, and intentionally enjoying the view and smelling the flowers all the while.
It was a poignant moment for me, when I realized it’s ok to have your own dreams and goals. Someone else’s happy is not necessarily your happy. It’s ok if you want to live a simple life and not the career others wished for you. And it’s also ok if you yearn to climb the corporate ladder and be a female boss of a fortune 500 company. It’s ok not to want a Ferrari, even if your friends do. And it’s ok if you do. Your goals, dreams, wishes, your values and priorities are as unique as you. Our lives are a gift, and ultimately the people that love us will respect the choices we make based on our own life philosophies. The people that love us want us to be happy. We should love ourselves enough to know we deserve to be happy and actively curate a life that is fulfilling and prosperous to us, no matter what that looks like.
Slow Living is as Unique as You
Looking at blogs, books, or social media accounts may lead one to think that the slow living lifestyle is just about sipping hot drinks, taking long walks, or reading all day. Or baking without the use of electrical appliances, or opting to hang laundry on a line to dry, or a culmination of other equally laborious, inconvenient, and slow ways of doing things. (No offense meant for those that find joy in these activities, I enjoy it too!) The common and popular representation of slow living or simple living seems to draw itself on these themes, but this is not the only way to live slow.
The whole point of slow living is to give yourself the time to be and do whatever it is that makes you feel whole – to be intentional about how we spend our time and to declutter places, things, activities, hobbies that don’t serve us or our loved ones. You don’t have to live in a little cottage in the woods, washing your laundry in a stream and chop your own wood. You don’t have to favor a certain aesthetic or decorate your home in a certain way to enjoy slow living. As a matter of fact you don’t have to be home at all to enjoy slow living. The philosophy of self love and of taking the time to nurture yourself by living with intention is all you need. So have the courage to make the changes big or small to live You deserve to be happy. Now go on and pursue your heart’s desires.
